Chapter XII. Frailing
Study guide section for this chapter →
Terms you must own
- Intention to give — state the maxim, and say what it replaces and what he says you receive.
- Frailing — define it in one sentence and name the one thing he says it depends on most.
- Forte — define it and say how it relates to a person's "resonant frequency".
- Challenge — say what it appeals to and give one wording of it.
- Anti-frailing — say what he gives as an example and why it fails.
- Pardon — define it, and say what it releases and when you use it.
Carried forward
Inner intention · outer intention · importance (self-worth) · excess potential · balanced forces · dependent relationship · alternatives flow · inner guardian · frail · slide (negative slide) · unity of heart and mind · free energy · energy vampire · goals and doors · transfer chain · target slide
Objectives
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recall Evidence: write the maxim, then the three cases, without the word "intention". [0:00:00] [0:21:41] [0:22:22]
explain Evidence: answer review question 2 in the guide; note that "everyone is trying to increase" it is a claim, not a finding. [0:03:12] [0:04:01] [0:24:48]
explain Evidence: answer review question 3; name the excess potential and the dependent relationship in her case. [0:04:01] [0:05:50] [0:06:40]
explain Evidence: write three sentences on why "acting unaffected" fails and "interest in them" works; answer review question 4. [0:08:52] [0:10:22] [0:14:23]
explain Evidence: write the definitions, then the sentence where he calls the model oversimplified; note that "frail" now means a person's whole range of traits. [0:55:14] [0:56:19] [0:57:54]
explain Evidence: draw a five-row table: tool, what you do, what it gives them. [1:00:47] [1:02:10] [1:03:24] [1:05:21] [1:06:03]
apply Evidence: do Desk work 1: one real request, rewritten in their frequency. [0:23:46] [0:29:21] [0:58:38] [1:00:03]
explain Evidence: give his three flaws, then say why he calls success "guaranteed" and what in your own experience would test that. [0:26:48] [0:30:37] [0:34:16] [0:35:10]
explain Evidence: answer review question 5; say why the hurt is "silent" and why he calls criticism anti-frailing, with the negative-slide example. [0:36:34] [0:40:33] [0:44:16] [1:08:34]
apply Evidence: do Desk work 2 on a real argument; say why the order matters. [0:46:03] [0:46:51] [0:48:00] [0:51:29]
explain Evidence: write the steps, then one sentence on how free energy and unity of heart and mind are meant to carry it; contrast it with an energy vampire. [1:11:22] [1:13:12] [1:14:03] [1:19:26]
explain Evidence: answer review question 7; then name one shortcoming you would pardon before a real event. [1:19:56] [1:20:40] [1:21:21] [1:22:05] [1:23:54]
apply Evidence: answer review question 8; write the steps as a checklist for a role you could apply for. [1:28:30] [1:29:11] [1:32:46] [1:37:21] [1:40:41] [1:41:55]
analyse Evidence: do Desk work 3; use his demand for sincerity against "not to change yourself" versus "work on your shortcomings". [0:02:19] [0:17:15] [1:39:41]
Readiness check
Answer these without looking anything up.
- What does replacing the intention to receive with the intention to give mean in practice? Give one case.
- Why does the woman who presses for marriage lose what she wants?
- At a party, what are the other guests mostly doing, and what follows for how you behave?
- What single thing does he say frailing depends on? Name three ways to show it.
- Why does winning an argument leave you worse off?
- Give the order of moves when you expect to be blamed.
- What does pardon release, and why does it help before an interview?
- Which claims in this chapter does he give no evidence for?
The next chapter assumes you hold one idea: self-worth, or importance, is the string by which pendulums and other people steer you, and giving up your own while honoring theirs lets outer intention work.